From The Mouth of Babes - Part 2

My son is a chatter box.  This is awesome and hilarious to me as he was such a late talker.  But now, the boy won’t shut up!!  (Which I actually do love)  Plus he says big words, or at least tries to say big words.  He is always surprising us and saying things you wouldn’t think a 2 ½ year old would say!  (Note to self: be careful what you say)

I wrote a post a few months back, HERE, about what he is saying and I am doing it again.  I LOVE keeping track of this stuff because it can be so easily forgotten. 

Some of my favorite things he says right now (Henry is 2 ½).

You not a child. 

“Mom, you no have this toy….you not a child.”

I not a child.

If he doesn’t want to do something you ask, like clean up toys.  “Mom, I can not do XYZ.  I not a child.”

I gots a lot of jobs to do. 

Me: “Henry, help pick up your toys.”

H: “I can’t mom, I gots a lot of jobs to do.”

(Yes, he is a busy child and always looking for ways out of his chores)

Yeah but. OR Ok but.

“Yeah but, I can’t eat that.”  “OK  but, I can’t do that.” “Yeah but, I want to do this.” 

OK, Mom.

Me: “Henry stop climbing on that”

H: “Ok, but no ask me to stop climbing. OK mom.”

Along with this one is…

You no touch this, OK?

Puts down ANYTHING “Mom, you no touch this, Ok?”

Be reasonable.

“Mom, be reasonable.”

(enough said)

Oh Man.

It is not so much the context, but rather how he says it. “Oooooh, maaaaan.”

No, I Heny.

Me: “Henry, you are silly.”

H: “I no silly, I Heny.”

Please. Please. Please. Or Hi. Hi. Hi.

He saw this on some cartoons and so he has to say those things three times.

Huh? What?

THE. BEST. Part of him saying this is the face he makes.    He will ask a question and say “huh” or “what” and snarl his lip a bit and ask a question.  It is super cute!!

What you say?!

Anytime you say something Henry doesn’t understand he says “what you say or why you say that?” with the look mentioned above.

He also thinks it is hilarious to call us Jenn and Terry instead of Mom and Dad. Sigh.

That’s weeeird.

Terry has a hard time understanding Henry.  Henry will keep trying to tell Terry what he is saying before he finally looks at me, with this frustrated face and says “MOM, daddy no get my words, tell daddy what I say.”  I am the translator around the house.

If one of us is getting mad or frustrated:

“Mommy...don't worry. It be OK. Sorry you are frustrated.” Sweet boy. 

(Thank you Daniel Tiger for teaching emotions!)

OR, sometimes he just looks at us and says….

“Hey mom (or dad), just chill.”

So Henry and I were talking about my sister, her boyfriend and their cat (Charlie) before bed and the following conversation happened:

H: why Charlie eat breafkest? (Breakfast)

Me: because he is hungry

H: but why

Me: because he runs around a lot and it makes him hungry

H: but why

Me: for the same reasons daddy and I feed you, Kristen and Josh feed Charlie.

H: yeah but......they no feed Charlie. This no charity.

Think he heard something about charity from caillou, and sure he doesn't know what it means, but hilarious nevertheless!!

He refers to his feet as Stinky Piggies.

When he passes gas we call it “toots”.  Well then I call Henry “Toots Mcgoots”.  He started saying that any time some farts.  Adorable.

Bitch.  Yeah, Terry and I are working on our swearing infront of him.  OOPS.

Along with what he is saying, there are also things I never thought I would say or talk about or do until I had a kid.

Don’t pull your penis like that!

H: “Mommy, my penis itches.”

Me: “Then scratch it.”

H: “No, you scratch it!!”

Me: “Uh, no one scratches your penis but you!!”

Don’t put your finger in your butt!!

Stop rubbing the peaches on your face and eat them.

Don’t sit on Godzilla!

Me: “Henry, don’t drink that bath water, you just peed in it!!” 

H: “Ok but, it is really really deissious!” (delicious)

Point your penis down!!!  (As I grab for it and push it down while he is peeing ALL over the toilet seat.)

Poop.  Fart. Penis.  I am glad I have the humor of a 14 year old boy because when you have a boy…..you have to be prepared for it all!!!

*Twopretzels…I promise I am not trying to copy you, I love writing these down too because they are hilarious!!

From the Mouth of Babes

So remember when I was blogging about how Henry was a late talker HERE and HERE?  Well if not at 18 months Henry wasn't talking much and by 20 months getting VERY frustrated communicating to us.  And then by August, a month before his 2nd birthday, words started spewing out of his mouth!  I mean he was learning and/or saying new words pretty much every day!  And then by the end of 2013 this child, who was a late talker, was talking NON-STOP!!  Phrases, trying to say words, repeating.  It is awesome :-)

So for my record and hopefully your entertainment, here are some of the funniest things he has said or things I enjoy hearing him say.

....

He says his name in the sweetest of voices!!  He pronounces it Hen-nee.  So cute :-)

....

This kid loves books (which makes me so happy as I am not a reader) and he loves to read books.  His version of The Monster at the End of This Book is FANTASTIC!!  I am trying to record, but normally it is a bedtime book and no cameras at bedtime.  But it goes something like this, turning pages as we go:

"Monster end book.  So scared! Shhhhhhhhh.  ALL RIGHT!!! NO TURN PAGES!! ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!!  No turn pages.  Scared.  OK, ALL RIGHT ALL RIGHT ALL RIGHT!!!  Scared. Monster book. No Turn pages. ALL RIGHT ALL RIGHT. All done."

You guys.  I could listen to his version over and over!! (and yes, the ALL RIGHT part is his favorite!)

....

Along with that he mimics everything, especially TV shows.  For instance, we are watching Daniel Tiger and Daniel goes to the doctor and gets his shot and Henry mimics everything. "Mama, I get shot. Close Eyes. Be happy. OUCH. Here sticker. All done!"  It is so cute to watch, especially as he checks your heart and eyes and everything before!

....

Every day after school (aka daycare aka the germ factory) I ask how his day was and what he did and we talk about his day.  Usually his response is something like "Great!  Play kids.  Eat. Dance." Well this week I asked him these questions and then he came up to me and put his hand on me and said "Mama, how day at work you?"  When I told him I had a good day he said "GREAT" and ran off to play.  It melted my heart.

 .....

A couple weeks ago I came downstairs from getting dressed and he is eating breakfast and the following conversation takes place:

H: “What that shirt?” points to shirt I am wearing

Me: “It’s a new shirt! Is it pretty?”

H: Shakes head NO.

Me: “What, you don’t like mama’s shirt?!”

H: Shakes head NO again.

Me: “Should I change?”

H: “Yes.” Continues eating and watching TV.

 I mean, come on!!  Kids keep it real.

.....

And then there are gems like when I was holding a baby and Henry got really needy and wanted to sit on my lap and I said “are you jealous” and he replied “No, I Henee”.  Awesome.  Yes, you are Henry!

....

Me: “Henry, you are a good kid!”

H: “I no kid”

Me: “You are not?  Are you a baby?”

H: “No!”

Me: “Well what are you?”

H:. “Henee big boy!”

....

Chasing something he says: "Me got it, Me got it!!"

.....

Drops something: "Aahhh, man!"

.....

When he falls or you sneeze or take a turn too fast or, well anything, he says "WHOA, WHOA, MAMA, WHOA!"  Or if he falls it is "Mama, I whoa'd"

.....

He is becoming a bit of a tattler, which we are working on.  Normally it is always tattling on Terry.  I think they provoke each other.

“Mommy!  Daddy No no’d me!!”
"DADDY IN CHAIR!!!"
"Daddy make me (brush) teeth!!!"

For some reason he is butting heads with Terry lately and everything terry does is tattled on, good or bad."

"MAMA!!! Daddy kiss me!!"
"Daddy wash face!!!"

Henry is a bit dramatic :-)

...

He also has attitude now so conversations like this:

H: "I want that!!"

Me: "No Henry, you cannot have (xyz)"

H: "I want that NOW!!!"

Me: "Henry, that is NOT how we ask for things."

H: "I want that now please."

I still chuckle to myself when he is not looking.  I mean, he said please, right?!

....

Me singing..

H: "STOP. No singing, mom!!  STOP SINGING NOW."

Mr. attitude.

OR

"shhhhhh, no talk mommy!!!". Uh, really.  You know you are a kid and we are adults, right. Oh, did I mention he thinks he is an adult?!

....

Of course though, out of everything he says to me or anyone else, my absolute favorite is:

Me: “Henry, I love you.”

H: “Yub you too.”

Sigh.



YOU GUYS.  These conversations just melt my heart and make me smile SO much!!


Addendum: This morning after I got dressed for work I went in to get Henry ready for school.  I walked in to a smiling child standing in his crib and this conversation took place:

Me: “Good morning, Henry!”
H: “Morning!”
Me: “How are you?”
H: “Great!”
Me: Now standing right next to the crib infront of him.
H: “Mommy’s booboos. I honk. HONK. HONK. HONK. HONK.” As he proceeds to honk my boobs

Nothing like a morning booboo (boobs) honk from your two year old to really get your morning started off right!  P.S. We have NO idea where he learned this.  No, really!

Kids – Keeping It Real

So last night I came home from work and Terry and Henry were upstairs.  After our initial hugs and greetings Henry and I found ourselves in my bedroom so I could change out of my work clothes. (FACT: If I am not out of my work clothes in less than 8 minutes from getting home my work clothes disintegrate off me.)

Well Henry climbed in our bed and wanted me to lay down with him under the covers.  I couldn’t pass up the offer.  So we laid there and I asked him about his day and he told me all about it, to which I understood approximately 12% of what he said.

He got really really close to me with his head on a pillow and mine on one as well and we shared such a sweet conversation.

He then looks at me and says:

H.: “Mommy?”

Me: “Yes buddy.”

H: Totally unrecognizable gibberish

And then he points at my nose and says…

H: “ucks!  Mommy ucks here!”

He then tries (I stop him!) to put his finger IN my nose to get out the ucks.

(Insert laughter from both of us)

Thank you my wonderful child for pointing out the fact that I have yucks in my nose.  I appreciate it.  

Also, please let me know if I have anything in my teeth, on my face, or if I have a funk about me.  Yep.  That would be great.  ;-)

Ahhhh, kids….keeping it real!!!

Grab Your Popcorn, This Movie is for Real!!

I am not going to lie, movies made by the Sci-Fi channel (I still hate that it is Sy-fy so I am not calling it that) are pretty awesome.  Mediocre acting, a plot that is not in the realm of possibility, and some form of an animal (or combination of animals like in the thrilling 2010 Sharktopus) that is just huge and pissed off!!  What is not to love?!

Last month Sci-Fi scored big with their hit Sharknado.  Even heard something about it on NPR.

Well following in the steps of, what I can only guess was an Oscar worthy movie, Sci-Fi has done it again with the new movie Ghost Shark!!

The premise.  “A great white shark is tortured and killed by a fisherman, then returns from the dead, exacting vengeance on all humans.” Yeah, it is a shark.  That comes back from the dead.  As a GHOST.  To kill people.  

I mean, really.  Does it get more genius than that.  I think not.

See the trailer HERE.  

No really....GO NOW!!  

I will wait.......

I know, right?!?! AWESOME!

Did you see the girl washing the car and the shark came from that tiny bucket?!?!  Who knew?!

Screw a classic like Jaws.  Sci-Fi is taking the shark movie to a whole new level.

I for one know what I will be doing on August 22nd.

I smell flop Oscar!!!

Who ya gonna call?!?!

News That Isn't News - Hey Kids Stop Pooping Infront Of My House

Saw this article title in the news today and it got my attention.

"Man Wants Jogger To Stop Pooping On His Property."

Yep, you read that right....but how about I repeat it for you just incase....

"Man Wants Jogger To Stop Pooping On His Property."

Article and Video HERE.

Apparently this lady takes an occasional morning jog and while she gets moving other things get moving and she needs to stop and release....with no time to actually go into a business or even wipe and wash.

Besides getting over the fact of just how incredibly disgusting this is; you can't help but laugh out of pure uncomfortableness, ridiculousness, and the thought of a person actually doing this.

In my head all I am thinking is the SNL skit called "Really, with Seth and Amy".

"Really, you decide you need to pinch one off down a dirty alley and you thought this would be a good idea?!  Come on really, you couldn't hold it until you got home or to a bathroom?!  Really?!  And even if this was an emergency and happened once we may understand (not really), but it has happened at least a half a dozen times in the SAME space.  I mean really, you couldn't have at least come prepared the 3rd or 4th times with a box of wet wipes and a plastic bag?!  Or I don't know, take a dump before you leave?!  Seriously, I mean REALLY?!?!  Apparently you really really do not like this guy...or your need depends. Really."

In all "seriousness", she could have at least brought a plastic bag :-)

This has been your daily dose of news that isn't news!

Want to Know What You Are Getting For Christmas This Year?!?!

I have decided that everyone I know can expect one of these in the mail for Christmas this year.

It is a crocheted Cabbage Patch hat.

Men, don't think you will be left out.

You are welcome.


Link HERE to story on Yahoo.

You can buy the pattern HERE on Etsy.

Finding Time to Work Out - Weighty Issues

When do you find time to work out?  It isn't always easy to find time.

Do you have to give up something to try to find time for yourself to work out?

Check out my blog post today at Weighty Issues, HERE, to answer and see what others say.

Personally, I think I am going to have to give up sleep to get myself healthy.

This will be me below....but at least I will look good, right?!

In The News - Funny

As I skimmed WTOL news at lunch today I see this headline:

"Women "Donkey Kicked" Officer.

I don't know why it caught me as funny but it made me laugh.  Then when I heard the reporter say it in the video clip I laughed even harder.

There is just something funny about the visual and the use of the phrase "donkey kicked".

Story HERE.

Happy Tuesday, Folks!!

Talk To Me - Tuesday Twenty

I love making these up and it has been awhile....so who wants to play?!

1. Favorite sound? / Least favorite sound?

I know it is cliché, but my sons laugh is truly the best sound I have ever heard.  As for least favorite….there is a list.  A loooong list.  I think I suffer from Misophonia (self-diagnosed of course).  Most noises drive me bonkers!  Not like a little annoyed, like I want to hurt or throw something at the person making the noise that annoys me.  I think loud chewing and slurping usually annoy me the most.

2. Anything unusual in your purse or pocket?

Today in my purse I found a bag of cheerios, a burp clothe,  hand wipes, a package of post-it notes, my flip-flops, and 3 Electric Light Orchestra  Cd’s.  Don’t ask.  I think if I keep looking in my Mary Poppins bag I may even find my son hiding.

3. One thing you have always wanted to do but haven’t?

Travel.  Like really travel.  Perhaps out of the country to Ireland or England.  Just wish flying wasn’t required and instead we had mastered teleportation.

4. One thing you have done but never want to do again?

Go back to High School.  I hated H.S.  It was not fun and I have no interest in going to any reunions.

5. Something you are afraid of? (Besides the fear of something happening to someone you care about.)

I am really afraid of heights.  Like, I hate going over bridges and even going up open staircases gets me anxious. Oh and dolls. Creepy, life-like dolls. *shiver*

6. Favorite word/s?

I don’t know if they are my favorite but I always use them way too much – awesome and seriously.  I also love to hear kind words like please & thank you as I feel they are not used as much anymore.

7. Least favorite word/s?

Moist. Panties.  Ew….  And definitely don’t use the words together.  I also HATE all these phrases or half words being used lately.  i.e. amaz-balls, tot ridic…things like that. SAY THE WORDS!

8. What is the first thing you notice about people?

Their smile and their eyes.  I think you can tell so much about a person based on those two features. Also, their manners.

9. Favorite color?

Green…any shade.

10. If you could only eat 5 foods the rest of your life, what would they be? (you can say an individual one like cheese or a meal like meatloaf and mashed potatoes)

Cheese, my deconstructed chicken parmesan with pasta, bread & butter, tortilla chips with guacamole and salsa, & gumbo.

11. Today I am thankful for:

Cool weather. I love cooler weather….Fall is da bomb! (Please still like me even though I just said da bomb)

12. If you could witness any event from the past, what would it be?

I would like to witness how things like the pyramids and Stonehenge were created so that I could go on the history channel and tell it how it REALLY was and tell them whether they were infact created by aliens or if we were just more resourceful back then.

13. What do you want to be when you “grow up”?

I still don’t know.  I miss event planning, but not corporate events more like kid events or fun events.  I have thought about getting my masters in recreational therapy….that sounds very interesting to me.  But, maybe after Terry completes his schooling then I can think about going back to complete mine.

14. If you could learn to do anything, what would it be?

Learn a different language or two.  Also sewing on a sewing machine so I can make Henry some awesome homemade costumes.

15. Have you learned anything new recently?

This past year I have been learning patience and acceptance that not everything is going to be or needs to be perfect.  I am still learning this every day.

16. What are you most looking forward to in the coming months?

Celebrating my favorite time of the year and seeing how Henry reacts to it all!! Pumpkins, thanksgiving, and Christmas, OH MY!....…I can’t wait to celebrate with him!

17. What things do you dislike about yourself that you want to improve?

 I hate how obsessed and worried I get about things.  I will lay in bed all night worrying about whether I turned the stove off or locked the door or put the garage door down and if I don’t  triple check it and tell myself over and over I did it before I go to bed I go crazy.  I basically have a routine and must follow it.  I am getting better, but if Henry’s room was off by even a degree to what I thought it should be I would worry to the point of crying.  I also repeat myself and have to do things multiple times and it gets annoying.  I am not spontaneous and sometimes I wish I was. Sometimes.    And how hard I am on myself and the way I do things or look.

18. What things do you love about yourself?

I think I am a kind person.  I also think I am polite, especially out in public.  Of course I think I am funny…that is a given.  I think I am a pretty good cook and love sharing that with people around me.  I also love my green eyes.

19. If you could have ANY animal as a pet, what would it be?

An elephant for sure.

20. One thing people may not know about you?

I was not a funny person growing up.  Infact, I was told multiple times that I did not have a sense of humor.  I don’t think it was until I was in college that I loosened up and started becoming funny and that stick started falling out of my ass.  I am still very awkward around strangers, but over the last decade I have really come out of my shell and I think I am hilarious, even when people don’t laugh at my jokes….you know,  due to the fact that they are in shock at just how funny I am.

Bonus - Current celebrity crush/es? (If you know me at all, you know I had to have this question)

There are way too many good looking people out there :/  I have included pictures for your own viewing pleasure and as much as I hated it I made sure the eye candy had their shirts on. Ugh....guess their faces will do. (P.S. can you tell I like a scruffy type guy ? Of course I do, my husband has mutton chops and has bright blue eyes!)

I think Johnny Depp is a given for everyone.  

Matt Bomer (he is gay but I would be his beard)

Alex O'Loughlin (He is sexy and has an accent, delicious!)

Jared Leto (Arrogant/rocker/activist with eyeliner. What’s not to love)

Zac Efron (Shut up, we all need at least one young’n on our list)

Ewan McGregor (Have you heard him talk or seen him smile? *swoon*)

Iris…this picture is for you!! :)

Hey Kylee and Michelle, there are no wrestlers on this list! Are you proud of me?! :)  

I Don't Want To Look But I Can't Seem To Look Away!

I am sorry to scare you!!

I know the main story is and should be whether this mom let her little girl go in a tanning bed. (CLICK HERE for the full story) If she did, she should totally be punished.  But lets just go with the fact that the courts are taking care of the legal stuff and talk about the big bronzed elephant in the room that the news people don't seem to be talking about!!

LADY, WTF HAPPENED TO YOUR SKIN?!?!?!

That is crazy.  At first I thought it was a joke....but alas, it is not.

This women should scare EVERYONE away from tanning and should be the poster women for why tanning is bad.  Granted, most people don't get this bad, but holy crap!

I can't even look at her without wondering the following:

(1) Does she thinks this is attractive?

(2) What does her skin feels like?

(3) How often does one have to tan to get that natural looking tan?

(4) Is she being tested for skin cancer?

WOW.

I mean....WOW.

(I apologize to all me readers for posting this picture....it isn't pretty!)

Friday Funny! Scratch That…Friday Flipp’n HILARIOUS!

One of the BEST things about having a child is when said child thinks you are the funniest thing EVER!  I know in the future, Henry will think I am totally lame and no longer funny (pshhh) so I am soaking it all up now and getting all the giggles I can out of him!

Well the other night I rocked the Improv with my one (wo)man performance.  Henry thought I was WHO-larious!!

I know it sounds like he is crying, but believe me he is cracking UP.  His face was bright red and he was shrieking with laughter.  And what was I doing to get this laughter, just making some random noise and shaking my head. (I know. Genius.)

For the record, I will be taking my act on the road, performing for babies all over the Midwest.  I do noises, I shake my body, eat toes, get noses, and an array of other skits that have babies rolling in their seats. (Literally rolling for some because they can’t crawl or sit yet. Others, only wish they could roll in their seats….someday little ones, some day.)

Please enjoy the videos.  And sorry for the poor video quality, it was on my camera phone (circa 2008) and I wasn’t paying attention to how I was filming.  I can’t do it all folks.

ENJOY!!!!!

Then and Now....

The other morning while I sat alone in our living room pumping and listening to the repetitive drone of my pump, basking in the only 20 minutes each day that are truly all mine, I thought about how my life has changed in the last year.  I thought about how things were then compared to how they are now.  And I thought I would share some of those things that have changed in my life the past 6 months!  

Then:

Sleeping in usually meant sleeping until 11am and not getting out of bed until noon.

Now:

Sleeping in means getting to sleep IN my own bed instead of on the futon in the baby’s room because Henry keeps waking up at night and it is just easier to stay in there.

Then:

Saying you were tired and actually being tired were two different things.  Usually when I said I was tired it just translated to being bored.

Now:

You are in a perpetual state of exhaustion and simply too tired to even say or think about how tired you really are.

Then:

Your boobs were perky, the same tone and when you had them out in front of your husband he got excited because it meant something special was about to happen!

Now:

Your boobs are just sad looking, you can see every vein, your nipples are cracked, and when you have your boobs out in front of your husband he doesn’t even notice you or them; and instead of your husband getting excited when he sees them, now your baby gets excited.

Then:

You could take as long as you wanted to eat dinner and even enjoy multiple courses at an actual restaurant!

Now:

Dinner consists of you scavenging for food from anywhere you can find it and eating as quickly as possible.

Then:

You sang your favorite band’s songs in the shower or car.

Now:

You find yourself singing kids songs….and hating the fact that you sort of enjoy them.

Then:

Conversation on bodily functions, while funny, were usually limited to special circumstances.

Now:

The day is not complete without at least one conversation & an accompanying picture message about poop.

Then:

Running to the store to get something small you forgot, like soap, took no time and was not that big of a deal.  Well, running to the store in general was no big deal.

Now:

If you have to run to the store for something it has to be strategically timed between feedings and naps and involves 30 minutes of prep time that includes (but is not limited to) changing his diaper, making sure he is properly dressed, fighting him as you strap him into his car seat, make sure you have: a burp cloth, pacifier, toy, back up toy, back up pacifier, make sure you are fully dressed and have your purse (including your wallet – made that mistake!).  Then you have to awkwardly climb in your car to load and unload him out of the middle portion of the back seat. And let’s not forget about once you are actually IN the store.  Usually once you think about all you have to do to pick up something, like soap, from the store you realize the best option is to forego the soap all together.

Then:

You could pick up and leave for a long weekend whenever!

Now:

They idea of taking all the necessary stuff required to go somewhere overnight causes anxiety…so you just don’t leave the house.

Then:

7:30am – Wake up

7:30 – 7:45 – Shower and get dressed

7:45 – 8 – Pack lunch and leave for work

8:30 – 5 – work

5:30 – Get home

5:30 – 7:30 – Terry’s at work so I get comfy clothes on and lie on the couch and watch TV. A nap may even be possible!

7:30 – start dinner

8 – Terry’s home, eat dinner

9:30 – go to bed

Sleep and Repeat

Now:

6am – Wake up

6:15 – 6:45 – Shower and get dressed

6:45 – 7:15 – Pump (and enjoy the alone time)

7:15 – 7:30 – Pack lunch, pump, bottles and leave for work

8am – 5pm – Work (pump at 11 & 4)

5:30 – 5:45 Get home and briefly go over Henry’s “STATS” for the day with Terry on the days he works  i.e. When did he eat, how many bottles, when did he sleep, how did he poop, how much/little did he vomit, how was your day, love you and bye! (I prefer the days he doesn't work!)

6:00 – 7:30 – Feeding solids and a bottle and then a nap.

7:30 – 9:15 – Play time, mom grabs a quick bite to eat, get ready for bed, story time.

9:15 – 9:45 – Feed last bottle of the day and put him in his crib to let him fall asleep.

9:45 – 12am - Wash bottles, prep bottles for the next day, pick up living room/house,  pump for 30-40 minutes, relax, have an actual (non text message) conversation with Terry, and then off to bed.

12am-6am – Possible baby wake ups in the middle of the night.

Sleep and Repeat.

Then:

I was happy, loved, and my life was really really good.

Now:

My life with Henry in it is AMAZING.  I had no idea I could love someone in this way and this much and that one little person could bring so much joy and happiness to our life. My heart is full and I wouldn’t change any part of my life NOW.

(Ok, maybe I would want some more sleep and naps….but that will come!!)

Nom, Nom, Nom....Time to Eat! Progression of a Hungry Babe. Alternate Title: When The Hell Did You Become a Big Boy?!

“mmmmmm, sweet potatoes makes meez happy!”

“Itsez, finger lickn goodz!”

“I’m outz! Nos more pleaze.”

“Timez to kleenz up!”

After lunch it is time for something to drink. Wait, you are holding your bottle yourself?!  

"Iz gots this."

Oh Henry, when did you become such a big boy.

Could You Please Pass The Giant Gummy Bear?

One of the things Terry got me for Christmas was a 1 pound package (two half pound) of Reese’s peanut butter cups. These things are HUGE, half pound huge at that.  A few years ago he got me ½ lb Sugar Daddy candy bar that is still sitting in the kitchen. (Seriously, the thought of eating that makes my teeth hurt.)

Now, there is a part of me that would really like to dig in to those peanut butter cups but I wonder (1) how will they taste being that the ratio of peanut butter to chocolate in a standard cup is near perfection and have they recreated that ratio in these cups? and (2) how do you even begin to eat one?  Do I cut it like a pie?  Just take a bite out of it?  I seriously don’t know which way seems less ridiculous and which is the least glutton-ess way of eating these.

In general, I don’t know how I feel about this whole giant candy craze that seems to be going on, and yes I realize that the person saying this is currently in possession of two ½ lb peanut butter cups. 

At Christmas giant marshmallows, giant gummy bears, and other giant sugary products were really popular gifts (hence me receiving my peanut butter cups).  But what do you do with a giant 5 lb gummy bear?  (Buy it here from Amazon for a mere $26.95 is what you do) Would I take that into work and sit it on my desk and whenever I am in the mood for some Cherry flavored, red dye, high fructose corn syrup deliciousness just lean over and take a bite out of my bear, whose name would be Sam by the way.  It just doesn’t seem right. 

 Or how about serving up a 2lb gourmet marshmallow at your next dinner party. (Buy one here for $28.)  Nothing says you love your friends and family more than putting them in a sugar coma after eating a slice of gourmet marshmallow.  

These giant treats just don’t seem right, and are the epitome of the type of overindulgent society we currently live in. Or maybe it is just a representation of our desire to always be a kid at heart.  Or maybe it is just people who figured they can make a quick buck off gimmicky items such as these.  Or maybe, just maybe, Willy Wonka is real and he is letting us know. 

Now pass me a knife and a large glass of milk, I have a 1/2lb peanut butter cup to eat! 

Texting with My Son

There are so many reasons why it is great having Terry stay home with Henry.  They get to form a special relationship, we don’t have to pay for child care, I can text Terry as many times during the day as I want, I am 100% certain Henry is in good hands with his daddy…and the list goes on and on!

And one of those other reasons is when Terry sends me picture text messages throughout the day.  Nearly every day I get a picture message of Henry and a little message.  I look forward to these a lot! (Yes spelling mistakes are suppose to be there.)

Like this one:

Henry: “I'm sorry I pooped all over my sleepy time clothes... but I loves you bunches, mommy:)”

Or this one:

Henry: “I mets a new friend at scool today.  Cans he stays fer super?”

Me: "Awww, what a nice friend!  Of course he can stay for dinner, I love pig :)  Oh mommy is just kidding, we wouldn't eat your friend"  (heehee)

Henry: "Your silly! Tanks mummy!"

But yesterday’s texts may be the best so far!

Henry had a Dr. Appt yesterday and he got 3 shots.  So I sent Terry a text telling him to just bring a small bottle of milk incase he needed it, but that I would boob Henry after his shots as it comforts him.

Terry sent me this picture and text:

Henry: “Oh that’s would be nice, mommy :)  Tank you mommy! …whats is a shots?”

Then I got this picture and text right after that one:

Henry: “Daddy just told me….I don’t thinks I need them.  Really I’m strongs likes the Hulks (whoever the Hulks is)"

Me: “Don’t cry baby.  Yes you are big and strong but these will make you indestructible! *smooches*"

Henry: “Whats “dindistrctables”? Okay, I trustest you mummy!”

Come on, that is good stuff right there!!  I don’t think a child care place would humor me and carry on a conversation like this :)

And yes, Terry and I send text messages back and forth “talking” for Henry ALL THE TIME.  We do the same thing with our cats too.  We are a special kind of crazy :)

Just for Fun! - I Can’t Wait to Use These Sayings On Our Kid Someday……

We all heard these as a kid and hated when our parents said them to us.  However, now that I am older I can’t wait to use these on Henry some day!

* While you live under our roof you have to obey our rules.

* I brought you into this world I can take you out.

* Three more bites.

* If ALL your friends jumped off a bridge would you jump off a bridge too?

* I don’t care what little Tommy is allowed to do; Little Tommy is not my child.

* If you keep making that face your face is going to stay like that!

* Don’t make me turn this car around!

* Don’t make me come upstairs!

* Do we live in a barn?

* Well in my day….

Any other ones from when you were a kid?!  Please share!