Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Pushing Through the Negative to Find the Positive in Myself

So, my first round of the 21 Day Fix I did AMAZING!   I lost something like 9lbs and 18 inches in just 3 weeks!!! 

And while I have managed to keep it off, this second round I have barely lost anything.  Between birthdays, our anniversary, and a head cold that will NOT go away….my motivation has been lacking big time and I am falling back into some of my bad habits.

A bad habit isn’t always physical….meaning binge eating, not wanting to workout, eating junk as I watch TV.  Infact, my eating has stayed pretty consistent, a splurge here and there.  And I workout when I can and feel up to it.

But bad habits are also mental.

Yep, I am mental! 

See, it is more so the frame of mind I fall back into that really brings me down and can be SO hard to get out of.

I get down on myself and focus on the negative.

“How could you let yourself become 100lbs overweight?”
“You still have so far to go.”
“You don’t have time for yourself, you have a family to take care of.  There isn’t time for you.”
“You lost 30lbs and your smaller clothes still don’t fit, you are never going to do this.”

Those are just a few of the thoughts that run through my head.  Perhaps I am a bit dramatic.

But after YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS of dealing with my weight and thinking about weight. And food and binge eating. And what you think other people are thinking about you….it wears on you.  It is hard to break that way of rationalizing when things don’t “go your way”.

I was being all pitiful and mentioning this to a dear friend (also my beachbody coach) and she reminded me that I didn’t put this weight on all at once and it is going to take time to get it all off.  And that I can do this. 

I agreed and cherish how much support she gives me, but still stayed in this funk.

I read how well other people are doing in our challenge group and for a minute got mad….not at them, but at ME.  I kept thinking, that could be you Jenn and you didn’t give it your all.

Then my mom said this week she wanted to help me become a coach because I am doing so great and she wants to help so I can keep going.  I appreciated this beyond words, but of course I was like…well I haven’t done so great the past few weeks. (turned it to a negative)

Then today.  I was listening to this coach meeting and she said “You are more important than giving up.” 

I think, after a week of people telling me over and over what I was failing to hear and remember, I finally heard it ALL at one time.

It all resonated with me and sunk in.  (I know, takes me a bit longer!!)

You guys, my biggest obstacle in losing weight isn’t the amount of weight I need to lose or even if I can do it. 

It is ME. 

It is getting past these thoughts in my heading that are stopping me from moving forward.  These thoughts I have had for years and years.

It is remembering that I. AM. IMPORTANT. 

That this is going to take time. And be hard. And not always go my way and be frustrating BUT I can do this.  And that I have SO MUCH support around me right now if I just open up and accept it.


I have to keep that in the back of my head.

I am worth it.

If I want to take care of my family and SHOW them how amazing eating whole foods is for your body and the benefits of working out, then I need to lead by example.

I need to get out of my head.

That may be my biggest challenge for me during this journey.  It is not easy.  Some people may be able to set their mind to something and just do it.  And in some ways I can.

But most of the time I am in my own head.

Questioning everything.

I realized early on this journey is far more than just losing weight.  There is so much more that has brought on this weight then just sitting on the couch and eating.  There are these mental blocks I need to push through.  I need to change up the way I think and view things.  I need to address WHY and HOW I got here and what is stopping me from moving forward.  The answer always come back to me.  I am stopping myself.

It is "funny" how that works, no?!

So today I am trying to refocus.  To take away the negative and focus on the positive.

“How could you let yourself become 100lbs overweight?”  It doesn’t matter how you got here, what matters is that YOU want to change and you CAN change.

“You still have so far to go.”  But you are closer today than you were yesterday!

“You don’t have time for yourself, you have a family to take care of.  There isn’t time for you.”  If you want to take care of your family you MUST take care of YOU first!  There is always time for YOU!

“You lost 30lbs and your smaller clothes still don’t fit, you are never going to do this.”  This will come, but it is more about how you FEEL right now!

I must get out of my head if I want to succeed. 
I am going to try to stay positive.

So, in an attempt to do this I have wrote down some of my thoughts and motivational quotes that I will repeat when I start getting down and falling back into my “bad habits”....

Run when you can, walk if you have to, crawl if you must but never EVER give up.

Focus on how far you have come and not how far you have to go.

When you feel like quitting, think about why you started.

I want to be a before and after. 
(This is something I keep saying to myself.  I want to have those before and after pictures that make people gasp....I want to show how much I have accomplished!)

Weight loss is not just a physical, but mental.

Don’t stop trying just because you have a hit a wall.  Progress is progress, no matter how small.  (This sounds very Dr. Seuss like….this pleases me)

This is a slow process.  Don’t make it slower by quitting.

I am WORTH this.  I CAN do this.  


I am worth it and YOU are worth.  We can do this.

What are some things you tell yourself to keep going?  

*I will becoming a beachbody coach in October.  If you are interested in more information, please let me know.  I want to help people just like they are helping me!!  I want to do this together!

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