I haven’t been blogging much the past couple weeks and I have to say part of the reason is the past couple weeks have just been FULL of emotions. Good, bad, scary, frustrated….all of them! So here is my This and That - Emotion Edition.
P.S. This is probably the most random, unorganized, wordy post I have written! My mind is just everywhere and out of control!!
1. Excitement coupled with a hint of sadness: My son turned TWO this weekend. Sigh. Leading up to this I was excited but sad. The idea of two has been harder, he will always be MY baby but he is no longer A baby. But the day came and went and as I rocked my two year old to bed Sunday night he cuddled up to me and held my hand and we sang our song like we do every night. I loved this so much. I think Henry is going to let me ease into this two year old thing…..and I can handle that. Birthday post and pictures coming soon to a blog near you!!
2. Joy: “Boppy, Baby” I sing this song (in henry’s words) to him every night, while he cuddles up on me and quietly whispers “boppy, boppy baby” along with me. It is Baby of Mine from Dumbo. See HERE. I tear up nearly every night singing it to him. I love this time, our time together. No one else, just me and my son singing together. So much joy.
3. Fear: We went to the ER a couple weeks ago because Henry had croup. It started when we were awaken at 3:15 in the morning to him making a noise, sort of convulsing and when we picked him up he had puked everywhere and was just very lethargic and non-responsive. He also had a very high fever. That was the most scared I have EVER been. My stomach still turns thinking about it. After an hour of getting him fluids and awake and cleaned up we took him to the ER. Of course by the time we got there he was walking around, talking and didn’t even look or act sick. He got a steroid and by the next day started feeling better! But those moments....scary.
4. Anticipation: I am listening to Christmas music already and getting so excited for not only Christmas but FALL. I feel like I am jumping out of my skin with excitement for fall, pumpkins, thanksgiving, Christmas…everything!
5. Frustration: The terrible twos have made their way into our house and it has come in the form of extreme independence and not listening.
I feel like this is the only thing I say anymore:
Henry, NO. Put that down! NO, Get away from that! DON’T touch that!! You will get hurt! Don’t stand on that! Don’t put that up your nose/in your ear! Henry, STOP IT!!!
To which his verbal response to me is usually: holds out hand in the stop motion “STOP IT” or “No Means No” or “No, Go!”. And most of the time continues with what he was doing.
I feel like in his mind when I am saying NO to him he is thinking:
What this, you don’t want me to touch THIS?! This thing in my hand that is not a toy, I should put it down?! You are not being very clear, do you want me to put THIS down or did you say put it in my mouth?! So to summarize, I am putting this in my mouth like you wanted, right?! Oh no, I am suppose to put this down…gotcha. Ok, I will put this down in the microwave and turn the microwave on. Great, I am glad we talked this through.
Now I have to give credit where credit is due and in some ways he is actually a very good listener. He will hold my hand in the parking lot and around cars and is VERY good with routines. It is mostly at home where he just feels he can do whatever he wants and get into everything or in places that there is just a lot to get into to, like a store.
And on top of that, everything, and I mean EV.ER.Y.THING. IS….NO. ME. I DO IT. NO. MEMEMEMEME. He basically thinks he is an adult and can do whatever we do. Even grab a pot holder and open the oven (not on folks!) and pull out the tray. Two time outs yesterday for that alone.
Sigh. There is this constant battle between letting him be independent and teaching limitations. It can be frustrating for all of us!
6. Confusion: I started couponing a couple weeks ago. I have done really well a couple shopping trips and saved a lot, and a couple other trips I made a few mistakes and didn’t do as well. I am still learning, but it has made me more aware of what we are buying and sales out there. I spend a few hours a week clipping coupons and preparing for sales and it is so confusing and a bit annoying. But it works and saves money so I am giving it a try. I will update more in a month or two!
7. Anger: A while back Terry told me I was very angry and if I needed to talk to someone I should. His words (which were a lot more than just that) hit me, pretty hard and then over the past few months things have happened that really have made me stop and gain perspective. What is important. Who is important. Why am I acting this way. I have been working to control those anger outbursts and feel like I am more focused on my family and this precious life we have and making moments count…not perfect, just making them count. Just by stopping, talking a step back, breathing, and putting things into perspective has really helped me not get angry in some situations or AS angry as I used too. In the sing-songy words of Daniel Tiger’s mom….when you feel so mad that you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four. 1…2…3….4. Ok, I will do that! Good bye anger :-)
8. Funny: I have my own sense of humor. I think I am funny but many times it is a funny that I feel only certain people who know me really get. With that said, I think it would be hilarious to make a FB page for Henry and post status updates like “Dids you see the last episode of Caillou?! He got to go on a boat for real!! Rosey was so scared…what a baby!!” or “Don’t tell my mom, but I hid her keys in the large drink mommy and daddy sit on! I can’t wait to watch her run around looking for them and then finding them in there!!” What, no one else thinks that is funny?!?! I think it is hilarious!! Coming from the girl who when she had a Myspace account she would post journals written by her cat. So…..
So there you go. That is what I have been thinking about the past few weeks and what is going on in my mind right now.
What are you up too?!